Remember last year when the internet was my Valentine? And Jake Ryan totally wasn’t.

Well, this year work is apparently my Valentine.

But I haven’t forgotten about you, and I have something new coming for Thursday. Something with pictures! And in the meantime, I’ve made you something else!

Last year, realizing how small the marketing for angry Valentines cards was, I made a Valentine for you to give to those you love to hate, your frenemies:

This year, as Hallmark continues to fail those of us who are spreading more than just love around, I’ve made a card for you to share with your nemesi! (I have to assume you have more than one nemesis–especially on a day like Valentine’s day.)

You’re welcome? Probably not. But this is happening anyway.